Mike's Tap Water Paradise

Happy Tap Water Thursday, fellow tapaholics! Hope everyone's staying hydrated out there. Today I'll be reviewing the tap water from my buddy Mike's house.

Inside Mike's lovely kitchen was a very interesting sink setup (and not a single dirty dish... he must not eat). I noticed that Mike had not one, but two faucets above his sink. I had to take a few minutes to regain consciousness, after passing out from excitement. Apparently one is for filtered water! Wow. I'm normally not one for filtration, but this was like a two-for-one deal, and I'm all about savings.

When I mentioned my blog (as I do in every social interaction), Mike offered me one of the fanciest pieces of glassware I have ever seen. I poured myself a glass of his filtered tap water, and downed a whole glass. The taste of nothing had never tasted so good.

Overall, I give Mike's tap water a 9 out of 10. I had to deduct a point because he wouldn't let me move into his kitchen.

That's all for today tap fam, I hope everyone has a wet and wild holiday!

Bob Ross and Crystal Glassware

Hey tapateers, sorry for the short hiatus, I’ve been scoping out new taps across the beautiful state of New Jersey.

Today I’m at Jeff and Dylan’s apartment, here to not only to watch Bob Ross on Netflix, but to scope out their tap situation. Here’s what went down:

I poured myself a large glass. Their faucet had a significantly large stream, maybe for bathing their pet squirrel or something..? I didn’t even know they had a pet squirrel… Anyway, I was impressed at how fast my glass filled up, since I’m all about time conservation. That’s at least 6 points, right off the bat.

I have to give 3 more points, due to the fact that they had a copious selection of crystal glassware, of which I picked nothing but the finest. It felt like that time I ordered a medium french fries at Burger King, and found a surprise onion ring; an unexplainable euphoria.

So Jeff and Dylan’s tap water gets a 9/10! I am definitely looking forward to experiencing this tap water again.

Until next time folks, happy tapping!

Saturday Part 2

Sup tapchachos, today is actually Sunday. But I'm no Negative Nelly, so today is just going to be Saturday Part 2.

I'm currently sitting in my girlfriend Tania's apartment in Roselle Park, NJ, drinking tap water out of a wine glass. I know what you're thinking, and you're right. I am really fancy right now. The water isn't the clearest; it's practically opaque. But I'll take my chances once again, since tap water is probably the least unhealthy thing I put into my body. #YUM

Here's an action shot! You can see how cloudy that water is. Those are just random unknown chemicals, I wouldn't worry about that.




Overall, I give this water an 8/10. I had to deduct two points for being hot, even after letting it run for a solid 10 minutes.

That's all for today tap fam, hope everyone has a happy second Saturday!

Drinking Out Of Mugs

Hey tap heads, hope everyone's having a killer weekend so far. I went to my buddy Kyle's house last night, and got a chance to scope out his tap situation. Interesting enough, his kitchen faucet only had one knob, but after severely burning both of my hands, I quickly realized that the cold water comes out when you turn it to the right. I'm still trying to determine the purpose of hot water.

After searching for a cup for half an hour with no luck, I found a mug and poured myself some water. I took a sip and tasted a slight hint of pharmaceutical waste; must've been city water. Nonetheless, I downed the whole thing and filled it up again. I figured if there were chemicals in the water, at least it's free!

Overall, I'd give Kyle's tap water a 9/10 (I had to deduct a point because of the fact that I had to drink from a mug). Definitely would drink again.

Stay hydrated fam <3

Tap God it's Friday!

Sup tap fam, hope everyone's having a rad day. The sun is out and I'm thirsty, so today I'm reviewing the tap water from my own kitchen sink!

To begin my thirst quenching journey, I poured some into a glass that I bought at White Castle for a dollar (probably the best thing they sell there), and took a large sip. Delicious. It reminded me of that time I found a bag of weed in a parking lot and smoked it all because it looked super dank... This water was just as free, and also not laced with hard drugs. What a win.

I took a closer look at the water, and it looked clearer than a microscope lens (although I'm no scientologist). I have to give it some bonus points for being well water, which means it comes from a hole in the ground. Who knows what's down there, but it looks pretty good to me!

Overall, my tap water is tasty as heck. I give it a 10 out of 10; would drink again!

That's all for today folks, stay hydrated!

Bathroom Discovery

Happy TWT (tap water Thursday) everyone! I just had to share something that I found very interesting today. I was in the bathroom staring into the mirror (a hobby of mine) when I suddenly looked down and saw a water faucet, right before my eyes! I turned the knob on the right, and to my surprise, clear water started flowing like the Nile river. What a rush.

I stood there, utterly bewildered, and stared at the running water for about half an hour. I realized that all bathrooms must have water faucets! What a magical discovery.

Whether you're thirsty, or you just love tap water like I do, don't ever be afraid to wrap your lips around the head of any running faucet. It's safe. Trust me.

Welcome to Tap Water Connoisseur!

As a tap water lover myself, I felt the obligation to create this blog to test and review tap water from all over the world. People tend to think that tap water is bad for you, but to me, free water is the best water. I'll take my chances.

For my first review, I'll be talking about the tap water from my friend Brian's house in Bound Brook, NJ. Here's an action shot:



On a scale of 1 to Fiji, I'd give this water a 10. It tastes about as clear as fresh roll of saran wrap. After I finished the glass, I drove straight to the nearest convenience store to inform them that all their bottled water SUCKS. I was unable to bring a sample of Brian's tap water, because I drank it all on the way there, but I'm hoping they took my word for it.

I highly recommend taking a journey to your nearest faucet, and I encourage everyone to embrace the godly liquid of the tap.

Stay hydrated my friends <3